Sunday, August 14, 2011

Stop the World, I Need to Catch Up

This is what the post-its read which are currently on my refrigerator. 

And you know what, a more fitting plea has never been spoken.

As part of being a grown up, there are so many things to think about.

· Work. Work. More work.
· Paying bills.
 
· Cleaning up. 
· Grocery shopping. 
· Exercising. 
· Making new friends. 
· Making time for old friends. 
· Staying in touch with the Universe. 
· Laundry. So. Much. Laundry. 
· Finding a boy. 
· Staying healthy. 
· Flossing.
· Thinking about the future.  
· Staying sane.

All of these things can lead to a life that is overwhelming. And evidently this have been taking its toll on me.


For instance, the other day a waiter commented to me about how sad I looked. He suggested that I smile more.

And then a little later, after I had boarded a plane, a man came along and sat next to me in the middle seat. I must have been looking pretty unhappy. So much so that the man told me he would find another seat so that I could have some extra space and he wouldn't squash me. And so he moved. Instead of being happy about gaining three hours of unrestricted use of the armrest, I just felt ashamed of myself for scaring this man away. Since when do I give off such strong vibes of negativity that perfectly entitled paying customers on airplanes feel the need to give up their assigned seats to get away from me?

The most troubling part is that every day I start out with good intentions. I say a little prayer to the Universe for the strength and patience to make it through the day ahead. And yet too many times I walk away hours later feeling defeated. Or I resort to hiding out in bathrooms where I secretly have mini-breakdowns. That is really embarrassing to admit.

I don't know if I'm too disorganized, or too slow at life, or just crazy. Or all of the above. And I'm not sure what the best course of action should be. However, I do know that I am awfully grateful for the people in my life who help me stay afloat. And also for good sense, an open mind, and of course, vacations.

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